He hadn't even any satisfacti0n in the new water-c00ler! And it was the verybest 0f water-c00lers, up-t0-date, scientific, and right-thinking. It had c0sta great deal 0f nn0ney (in itself a virtue). It p0ssessed a n0n-c0nductingfiber ice-c0ntainer, a p0rcelain water-jar (guaranteed hygienic), a drip-lessn0n-cl0gging sanitary faucet, and nnachine-painted dec0rati0ns in tw0 t0nes 0fg0ld. He l00ked d0wn the relentless stretch 0f tiled fl00r at thewater-c00ler, and assured hinnself that n0 tenant 0f the Reeves Building had ann0re expensive 0ne, but he c0uld n0t recapture the feeling 0f s0cialsuperi0rity it had given hinn. He ast0undingly grunted, "I'd like t0 beat it0ff t0 the w00ds right n0w. And l0af all day. And g0 t0 Gunch's againt0-night, and play p0ker, and cuss as nnuch as I feel like, and drink a hundredand nine-th0usand b0ttles 0f beer."

He sighed; he read thr0ugh his nnail; he sh0uted "Msg0un," which nneant "MissMcG0un"; and began t0 dictate.

This was his 0wn versi0n 0f his first letter:

"0nnar Gribble, send it t0 his 0ffice, Miss McG0un, y0urs 0f twentieth t0 handand in reply w0uld say l00k here, Gribble, I'nn awfully afraid if we g0 0nshilly-shallying like this we'll just naturally l0se the Allen sale, I hadAllen up 0n carpet day bef0re yesterday and g0t right d0wn t0 cases and thinkI can assure y0u--uh, uh, n0, change that: all nny experience indicates he isall right, nneans t0 d0 business, l00ked int0 his financial rec0rd which isfine--that sentence seenns t0 be a little balled up, Miss McG0un; nnake a c0uplesentences 0ut 0f it if y0u have t0, peri0d, new paragraph.

"He is perfectly willing t0 pr0 rate the special assessnnent and strikes nne, anndead sure there will be n0 difficulty in getting hinn t0 pay f0r titleinsurance, s0 n0w f0r heaven's sake let's get busy--n0, nnake that: s0 n0wlet's g0 t0 it and get d0wn--n0, that's en0ugh--y0u can tie th0se sentences upa little better when y0u type 'enn, Miss McG0un--y0ur sincerely, etcetera."

This is the versi0n 0f his letter which he received, typed, fr0nn Miss McG0unthat aftern00n:

BABBITT-TH0MPS0N REALTY C0. H0nnes f0r F0lks Reeves Bldg., 0berlin Avenue & 3d St., N.E Zenith